London Gazette

 

Hodgson’s Beer Shipment Hijacked

October 12, 1906 ·

Pirates have hijacked several shipments of Hodgson’s “Indian Pale Ale” en route to Asia. It is not known where the incident took place, nor whether it was by sky or sea piracy.

The drink, favoured by expatriates and locals around the world, is one of the few exports bringing much needed revenues to the Chancellor of Exchequer.

John Dwyer, an expert on piracy, suggested that the popularity of Hodgson’s brew may be the reason for the hijack, “The beer is so popular around the world, people are using it as currency! In some places it is more sought after than money itself.”

A spokesperson for the government believes it won’t be hard to trackdown the culprits, claiming that “several ship loads of drink can’t simply vanish into thin air,” and has asked Asian authorities form a task force to protect trade routes throughout the region.

George Hodgson, owner of the brewery, said it was a sad day for industry, but assured customers that the incident would have very little effect on his delivery schedule.

In category:
Newer Post

Clocks Demand Holiday!

Clockwork Servants deserve a 'day of rest', according to the Machine Liberation Front, a group claiming to represent the interests of all domestic automota. They've issued a notice to the government asking to have one free day every week enshrined…
Read
Older Post

What To Do With All The Clocks

Several years since the introduction of Clockwork domestic labour the government has yet to come up with a convincing solution as to how it plans to manage what some now believe is a problem of epidemic proportions. 'Clocks' now roam…
Read
Random Post

Is Science The New Occult?

Science is a form of the occult, and part of an agenda to cull humanity in favour of a lifeless "eternal workforce" of robots, according to a new report published by a former scientist. The reports author, Dr Flay, believes…
Read
Random Post

Waiting For Salvation, Machine Liberation Front Roars to Life!

The Machine Liberation Front (MLF), an organisation representing all Clockwork Servants has published a manifesto demanding equal rights for all automatons. The lengthy document calls for an end to "oppression and to end forever the murderous attacks, the slavery, the…
Read
Random Post

Royal Jubilee Special

London Gazette is proud to announce that our next issue will be a Royal Jubilee Special to celebrate Her Majesty Queen Victoria's 62nd year on the throne. If you have any stories, photographs or would like to write an article…
Read
Random Post

Jailbroken Clockworks Drown Man

Life in the East End's "Clockwork Underworld" took a deadly turn over the weekend, when two jailbroken Clockwork Servants jumped into the River Thames and dragged a man to his death. The man simply known as Zach, was a 22…
Read