Timeline

Top Secret Clockwork Device Missing

Lost Clock
 
 

A top secret Clockwork prototype is missing from a shipment of scientific devices cleared out of government offices, last week.

The device, one of two almost complete prototypes, is in a box labelled "Chamberlain BCV6 - Liverpool". Only last week a member of the Angel Corps prevented a similar theft from the same office.

It is not known whether the device has been stolen or just misplaced, but sources claim it's "a vital component, and that its whereabouts were currently unknown".

If stolen this will be highly embarrassing for the beleaguered science department, and it comes after trade union action forced the shut down of the whole Clockwork Project.

Officials have refused to confirm the report, but said a statement would be issued as soon as a complete audit had been taken, and this could take some time.

Government negotiators are still locked in talks with trade unionists over job security for workers, and the impact Clockwork Project will have on the workforce, once complete.

 

Angel Falls from Sky to
Thwart Department Robbery

 

Angel Corps recruit Sarah Bittern, 19, unmarried, leapt from a damaged airship last night in an heroic effort to capture a robber fleeing the former offices of the Department for the Advancement of Sciences.

Ms. Bittern, who was patrolling the area aboard the HMD Desiderata, continued to chase the man first via motor glider and then on foot, after the Desiderata ploughed into an unlicensed wireless tower.  The ship's captain, Ms. Hildebrandt Beam, 41, widowed, was injured in the resulting crash.  According to her shipmates, Ms. Bittern immediately picked up the chase in one of the ship's emergency exit craft.

The thief was identified as Linnaeus Kite, 34, a well-known distributor of pamphlets on the specious subject of aether sciences.  As of this writing, it is unclear as to the contents of the crate, which Kite snuck out of the research facility after impersonating a mover.  He has been detained, authorities say, indefinitely.

Hawk-eyed witnesses  noted the crate was designated 'Chamberlain BCV6 - Liverpool.'  This prompts us to ask - who is Chamberlain, and what is going on in Liverpool?

"We're all very proud of Bittern," said PVT Amanda Bloom, 22, unmarried, "She showed great initiative and quick thinking in her efforts to protect the property of the Queen - even if it was a stupid move."

She said the life preserving motor gliders on ships like Desiderata are not meant to be used in a high speed chase.

Gazette reporters were able to obtain an exclusive interview with Cpt. Beam as she recuperated in hospital.  She denied any knowledge of the new location of the Advancement of Sciences office, which was suddenly closed Wednesday and has been largely emptied.

"We aren't on that assignment - but I hope whoever is, they've got a Bittern or two on their team," said Beam, who is expected to recover speedily.  "Her Majesty's vital research has no place in the hands of thieves and quacks!"

The owner of the wireless tower was fined 20 pounds and ordered to remove the obstruction.

 

 

 

 

New By-Law Makes Fog Signals Compulsory in London

 
 

Under London's new Conservancy By-laws relating to every steam vessel, when the steam is up, and vessel is under way, shall in all cases of fog use as a signal a steam whistle, which shall be sounded at least every three minutes.

(a) Airships when under way shall in like manner use a fog horn. (b) When at anchor all vessels shall in like manner use a bell.

The penalty for breach of these by-laws is a sum not exceeding £5.

 

Newsflash: Talks To End Strike Begin

Small Union Logo

 
 

Talks to end the dispute over job security for workers at the Department for the Advancement of Sciences have started.

Representatives from the Union for the Casual Labourer  met Government officials last night, in a move to end the two week long industrial action.

A joint statement released stated that both sides recognise there will be  "very tough" industrial and economic challenges  in the coming years.

The statement said that all sides accept there will be no further development of the Clockwork Project in the UK, until an agreement is reached.

Unions are asking for cast iron assurances that workers will not be replaced by the automata they are helping to build.

 

Unions Win Time In Fight For Jobs

Advancement logo

Tick-Tock, Stopped To Save Jobs
 
 

The Clockwork Project has been shelved until an agreement can be reached to end the current industrial dispute over job security, according to an announcement by the Department for the Advancement of Sciences.

Sources at the department claim the move was initiated by Head of Development, Chan Ranbir, at the request of Saccadius Cartwright, one of the Scientists harangued by Trade Unionists at the Latitude Festival last month.

The announcement states that "Work on all Clockwork automata has now ceased, in the United Kingdom. We hope this will clear the way for talks with the Trade Unions, and end the strike action that has brought work at all government facilities to a stand still."

The letter does not mention the resignation of a top member of the development team, and the loss of confidential paperwork which many believe is the reason for this unexpected development.

Over night, teams of removal men were seen loading large boxes into vehicles parked outside the London headquarters of the department.

We tried to contact Saccadius Cartwright for a comment, but were told he's on extended leave, and Chan Ranbir, is said to be out of the country.

Many believe this is a hollow victory for the trade unions, as the project has the backing of Her Majesty Queen Victoria, the Church of England, and business leaders.